Monday, June 06, 2011

Unbelievably ridiculous and unnecessary

And I thought this was bad.

What's even more annoying than birds chirping outside our bedroom window at 5am?  I'll tell you what.  A cat caterwauling (aka making a really loud obnoxious sound) in our yard at 4AM!!

I just have one word for that.  Actually I have lots of words for that, but only one that I will share...


Needless to say, we were not happy to be awakened by this noise at 4 O'CLOCK IN THE EVER LOVIN' AM.  Then once I fell back asleep I got to dream about someone trying to kill me.  Nice.  And Vince was all cool about it (in my dream, hopefully I'd get a better reaction out of him in real life).  It was some teenage kid living in our house (who incidently bore NO resemblance whatsoever to any of the teenage kids who actually live in our house, just to clarify). 

Whoever he was, and for whatever reason he was living in my house and wanted to kill me, this kid was relentless.  And I have to say, despite Mr. W's apparent apathy toward it all, I was a genius at thwarting each of his plans.  He tried setting up a machine gun, but I took all the bullets.  He tried making me sniff three different chemicals, but I plugged my nose.  I even went and told his parents, who were at a party and just laughed at me.

I'm not sure why I dreamt all of this.  Maybe it was a direct result of the cat incident and Vince's comment as he shut our window at 4 O'CLOCK IN THE EVER LOVIN' AM...

"That cat needs to be shot". 

You may not know this about me, but I am really good at interpretting dreams, so here goes.  The way I see it, this particular dream could mean one of three things...

1)  Someone is indeed planning to kill me and I am subconsciously warning myself in my dream.
2)  The teenagers who actually do live in our home sometimes sound like screaming cats in heat.
3)  I am the cat.

There is also a 4th possible interpretation of my dream, and that is that I need therapy.

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