You Don’t Say!

Lucy and Elmer lived in the red house next door.  They were super old people, at least that’s what my four year old self thought.  I used to go over and visit a lot.  Elmer was always outside, wearing farmers overalls and a hat with a brim, walking around the yard or doing man stuff in his garage like my dad.  If he wasn't too busy he would smile and say hi to me which was nice, but I was there to see Lucy.  

I don’t remember exactly what she looked like, but I think she wore glasses and had brown, wavy hair.  Or maybe it was grey?  I didn't pay much attention to appearances then, and the same is true now.  If you ask me what someone looked like or what they were wearing I might have a vague recollection, but it will most certainly lack detail.  I'm much more likely to remember what someone said, or how they were feeling.  

Lucy was always in her kitchen with an apron on, busy at work making something.  I remember her rolling out dough with a rolling pin and sometimes she would let me roll it.  She always seemed so happy to me, carefree and smiling.  She would listen with delight to whatever I had to say…which was a lot.  I would go on and on (and on) about my favorite show…Gilligan’s Island, telling her every detail and according to my dad would even include the commercials (Lucy wasn’t the only one who was blessed with my Gilligan stories).  

And Lucy gave me the greatest gift…she listened.  She not only listened, but she engaged with me, as if she was truly interested and thrilled with every word. “You don’t say!” was the response she gave after every exclamation I made.  And that of course encouraged me to keep going.  

She never seemed to tire of it. 

I remember more than once my mom yelling to Lucy from across the yard that she could send me home if I was bothering her.  Lucy always seemed surprised at the thought and said no, that I wasn’t a bother at all!  And I believed her.  Such a sweet lady.   

She made me feel special, and that was something.  

I hope I was that kind of mom to my kids when they were little.  I wanted to be and still do.  I want my kids, my grands, and whoever I'm with at the moment to know that they matter, I'm really listening, and that besides Jesus they are the most important person in the room.  

"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel."  - Maya Angelou

Praise workouts and the way it's (not) supposed to be

So I started working out.  Every morning for the past week (not including the weekend because that's just crazy talk) I have set my alarm for 5:45am, which is 1/2 hour earlier than I used to, and I have been actually getting out of bed and starting my workout by 6am.

Not to be all braggy, but this is a big deal for me!  I have not stuck to a workout plan for, oh I don't know, several decades so I'm kinda happy with myself for sticking to this one for a whole week.  And I am enjoying it so much that I don't see me stopping anytime soon...hopefully never.  

Before you are too impressed, I'm not talking about a high energy, aerobic sweatfest.  I'm doing a very low impact stretching and toning routine that I like to call "not-yoga".  It's similar to yoga I suppose, but without the spiritual stuff because this girl don't do that.  (Except for goat yoga.  That is actually an actual thing!  I might have to try that sometime because, baby goats!).  

I've been doing a variation of my not-yoga routine since high school, and I literally noticed the benefits on the very first day.  I have more energy and feel more relaxed all day long.  And it's more than just a workout...I made a playlist of worship songs that lasts for almost exactly 30 minutes (so I don't have to keep checking the clock) and I am using that time for praise or prayer, or both.  What I, for years didn't think I could do (make time to work out OR get up earlier than I had to) has now become the best part of my day.  I look forward to getting up and don't keep hitting the snooze (also, putting my alarm clock a little farther away helps with that little habit).  

And...I feel closer to God, and that is the absolute best.

So after my praise workout - yes!  I'm going to call it my praise workout now!!  So much better than not-yoga :)  After my praise workout I resist the urge to flop on my bed and waste time on facebook, and I put on a podcast instead.  I had been listening to Joyce Meyer's podcast for the past several months while getting ready for work, but a couple weeks ago I started listening to the Proverbs 31 podcast.  It is nothing short of life changing for me.  I'm in the middle of the "Therapy and Theology" series, which is a great follow up to the bible study I just finished on Lysa Terkeurst's book "It's Not Supposed To Be This Way".  

Also life changing.

I seriously needed that book, and this podcast, at this exact time of my life.  Both have helped me on so many levels and I know I am going to be camping on them for some time to come.  And by camping, I mean re-reading the book and things I've hi-lighted in it, going over my study notes, and listening to the podcasts over and possibly over again.  I need repetition to truly learn something.  Some people can hear things once and get it.  I tend to need to go over things two or ten times before I truly retain it and am able to apply the concepts to my life.  

And if I'm going to be totally transparent, there are multiple areas of my life right now that I could say, and some days scream...IT'S NOT SUPPOSED TO BE THIS WAY!!!

1)  I'm SUPPOSED to have a house full of kids, and as I've already talked about here and here, I'm having some adjustment issues with our two babies graduating this year and the idea of an empty nest looming in our not-so-distant future.  Not only that (which is enough) but my male cherub is giving me an aneurysm with his lackadaisical attitude toward school...in this, the home stretch of his senior year.  

"I've got this, Mom", he says.  "Everything's fiiiine, Mother", he says.  

Meanwhile, I'm thinking he should be rounding third and running full bore for home plate, when in reality he is farting around somewhere near 2nd base...kicking the dirt and staring at his glove like he did in t-ball which was adorable back then.  Now, not so much.  

2)  Mr. Wonderful and I are SUPPOSED to have all the kinks worked out in our marriage, particularly in our parenting styles, but to be honest we have walked through some stuff.  Especially over the last five years. Hello counselor, my old friend....I've come to talk with you again...

3)  I'm SUPPOSED to be turning 40, not 50.  I'm not feeling 50.  It sounds old...at least older than I feel.  Maybe that's a good thing?  That I don't feel as old as I actually am?  I guess I don't mind it THAT much, I'm not hung up on age.  But it does feel weird.

4)  As we are approaching the end of our season of "raising children", I am doing a life review of sorts and there are some things that I wish we would have done.  And others I wish we would have done differently.  But one that I'm hung up on right now is that we were SUPPOSED to have taken more vacations as a family.  We wanted to, but as life moved along we never seemed to have the money or the time.  It was easier to pack up and go when the kids were pre-teens, before they had jobs and extra curriculars to keep us tied to home.  

Our kids haven't been deprived, and neither have Vince and I.  I know that.  We have all been on vacations, in various combinations of kids and parents, but we never took a real family vacation ALL together during their growing up years.  Which are now coming to an end.

Sigh.

We are however planning a real deal family vacation for this summer!  We are going to Okoboji, staying by a lake and doing lots of water fun and mini-golfing and game playing and relaxing.  And just being together.  

As I sit here typing that out, I realize that I need to just slap myself - and remember that it's not too late.  It will never be too late.  We will ALWAYS be a family and there will be countless opportunities in the years to come to make even more memories together.  I need to let go of the memories that we didn't make, remember the ones that we did, and look forward to the ones we have yet to make in the future.

And THAT's the way it's SUPPOSED to be :)

My boy is almost home, and why is Robert Irvine yelling at me??

We have been watching a lot of "Restaurant Impossible" lately...you know, the show on the Food Network where professional chef Robert Irvine goes to failing restaurants and helps rescue them.  The show gives the restaurant a makeover and helps the owners learn how to cook better, and manage their business.  I used to hate the show because Robert Irvine, while he knows what he's talking about, is SO MEAN!  He yells at the owners sometimes, especially when their restaurant is not clean and so lately when I look at the dust on my bookshelf and the hair on the bathroom floor I hear him yelling at me in my head..."YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF!!  THIS IS DISGUSTING!!!"

Sigh.

I value a clean home.  I can't truly enjoy and relax in our home when it's not.  I've talked about that before.  I'm not OCD or anything (except my kids would probably tell you differently, especially when my "handwashing nazi" comes out), but I do need things to be relatively organized and clean and smelling like something good.  Smells are huge for me.  I don't care how nice a room looks, if it smells bad it ruins the entire ambiance.

This is my favorite thing to keep our house smelling good and homey...

  

It's a warmer.  I used to put whole candles in it but soon realized that the smell goes out of them far sooner than if they were burned, so I switched over to buying those little wax melts.  I have several kinds but my favorite melts are from the best store in Winona...Pieces of the Past, where it smells like (singing) Heaven!

I put one melt in a little mason jar and soon our house smells like caramel or coffee or cinnamon or apples or some luscious combination of all of those.  

  

Our house right now is still decorated for Christmas.  Usually I would be packing it all up by now, but I promised Nicolas that we would leave it up until he comes home from his deployment, which will be very soon now!  And we will have Christmas with him in our newly remodeled cabiny-basement :)  when he is finally home.

Baby St. Nick :)

Can't wait to see my boy :)  It's been a long 11 months, and an especially long holiday season without him. 

These pics were taken at his "going away" dinner at Ground Round, and his other "going away" lunch at Wild Bills in Rochester shortly before his deployment last March. I was a bit of a puddle the day he left but thankfully we have been able to video-chat often over the past year so he didn't seem quite as far away.  Man, a lot has happened in our lives since then...

My sister Donna got baptized!  PTL!  I flew out to be there and see her and her kids for a few days.

Vince and I saw Casting Crowns in MPLS, and also went to Minnehaha Falls!

Kyle and Hope both got their driver's licenses!  AAAAAAH!

Vince and I bought new dressers at The Shanty in Alma.  It was the first time either of us have had matching bedroom furniture :)

And we happened upon this little gem of a place. 

Family dinner at Famous Dave's with most of our peoples

My parents came for a visit :)

Kyle was baptized with this group of guys from his youth group!

Grammie and Papa times :)

Hope and Vince shared the stage in Chitty!

Our anniversary weekend in MPLS, back at Minnehaha Falls and an afternoon in Stillwater.

We bought Nicolas some army guy gummies at this old fashioned candy shop!

Shenanegans at MOA!

My flowers survived the whole summer long...miracles do happen, people!

Shopping therapy with my other Donna!  I love my Donnas :)

And the winner is....

Our princess and Queen :)

I tagged along on Vince's salmon fishing trip in Milwaukee

 

Road tripping with Donna and Dave - we ate here at The Pickle Factory, which is where Nicolas called me and told me about the hurricane they were preparing for (cue minor freaking out).

Preparing for our long awaited new flooring!

These guys got to meet one of their idols at Wizard Con in Madison WI...Stan Lee, the creator of Marvel Comics!

Our first grandbaby, Jaden turned...8!!  (Whaaaaah???)

We met up with Stephanie, Brandon and Lindsey in MPLS, just a week after the shooting in Vegas.  So good to see them and see firsthand that they were ok. 

And then it was off to RENO!  for my nephew Justin & Rachel's wedding!  What a blast!
Wish we could have taken the whole fam.

Hope's first leading role in "Once Upon a Mattress", hilarious!

Tim Hawkins in Rochester....also hilarious!!!

Macers, waiting for her favorite soldier to come home. I can't wait to see how excited she will be!!

Our new kitchen chalkboard is home to some pretty cool art.

Our Thanksgiving movie tradition!  We saw Murder on the Orient Express.

Wine and Canvas night at Signatures (where Trevor also works!)

Baking banana bread with Grama Fwisa :)

Vinny's RCTC graduation lunch in Rochester at Outback Steakhouse!

...where we also exchanged Christmas gifts with Dad & Kathy!

Christmas morning...we video-chatted with Nicolas during the whole gift opening, so fun :)

And then...these two got engaged!!!

Howard Christmas at the Canell's.

Oh Bekah Sue, we love you so!

Lunching with Jay :)

Best. Grandson. Ever.

One of our favorite movies this year...The Greatest Showman!

So many great memories over the past 11 months!!  

Now here we are, my boy will soon be home and we will have the rest of 2018 (and many more years) to make new memories...with my Mr. Wonderful and ALL of our amazing kids and grandkids!

We are so incredibly blessed :)