As I was driving into work this morning, in my Monday morning slump - wondering how I will contrive the energy needed to give my best to the children I work with after a fragmented night's sleep - God reminded me of this...
Today is a new day!
Everyday is a new beginning!
And because of Jesus, everything I do has meaning and purpose and value. Everything.
As the sun shown down on me and on the bluffs along the Mississippi, I was reminded that I can be a light and a blessing in the lives of the people God puts in my path today. I can be a blessing because I am blessed. And it doesn't depend on whether I had a good night's sleep or not...whether I feel competent and confident or not...HE will give me the energy and the insight to do it!
"Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for him." The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the LORD." - Lamentations 3:21-26
Monday, November 09, 2009
Sunday, November 08, 2009
A journey
I have been blogging for three years now....well, not constantly for three years. That would be a very long ramble and I would have had to pee really bad by now. Oh come on, it's funny.
I was introduced to the "real" world of blogging by Mr. Wonderful, who helped me create this blog back in August of 2007. Prior to Vince, I did not even know about Blogger or that there were all these blogs out there. Honestly. The only blogging I knew of was on Myspace. Yes, I had a Myspace account. Don't judge me. I know that Myspace was very teeny-bopperish of me, but honestly my only purpose in having a Myspace was to spy on my nieces and nephews. They all had one and it was a way for me to keep in touch with them, and of course see what they were into and up to. My niece set me up with a Myspace account and I wrote in the blog part of it now and again for about a year before I met Vince and he made me a "real" blog. This, by the way, was my very first "real" blog post, in which I wrote about meeting and falling in love with Mr. W. I think I'll go read it again now, just forfun love.
Aaaah. I love that man.
Anyhoo...before I deleted my Myspace account, I printed out all of my blog entries and kept them in a binder with my journals. I love to write (which is why I have a blog and journals in the first place). A while ago, I decided that I would type out each entry from my old blog and add them to this one. I wanted to preserve them, and the memories that they reflect. Although when I printed them, I wasn't able to print out any of the comments from my nieces and nephews, so those were lost which makes me really sad!
Tonight I finished typing out all of my "pre-Vince" blog posts (from October 2006 to August 2007) and added them to my archives. It was fun reliving some of those moments of my life, which seem like a lifetime ago now! I think it was a bit therapeutic for me as well, as I was reminded of all the healing that God brought to me during a very long and sometimes difficult season as a single parent. This post in particular from January 7, 2007 brought tears to my eyes. I wrote it before I ever knew who Vince Howard was...months before I ever laid eyes on the man who would later that year become my Mr. Wonderful. I wonder....no, I know that God had things all planned out for Vince and I when I wrote that post. I just didn't know it yet. I had to get to a place in my heart where I trusted God with my future, and was at peace with His plans for me. This was a step in that journey...a journey that I still travel.
I was introduced to the "real" world of blogging by Mr. Wonderful, who helped me create this blog back in August of 2007. Prior to Vince, I did not even know about Blogger or that there were all these blogs out there. Honestly. The only blogging I knew of was on Myspace. Yes, I had a Myspace account. Don't judge me. I know that Myspace was very teeny-bopperish of me, but honestly my only purpose in having a Myspace was to spy on my nieces and nephews. They all had one and it was a way for me to keep in touch with them, and of course see what they were into and up to. My niece set me up with a Myspace account and I wrote in the blog part of it now and again for about a year before I met Vince and he made me a "real" blog. This, by the way, was my very first "real" blog post, in which I wrote about meeting and falling in love with Mr. W. I think I'll go read it again now, just for
Aaaah. I love that man.
Anyhoo...before I deleted my Myspace account, I printed out all of my blog entries and kept them in a binder with my journals. I love to write (which is why I have a blog and journals in the first place). A while ago, I decided that I would type out each entry from my old blog and add them to this one. I wanted to preserve them, and the memories that they reflect. Although when I printed them, I wasn't able to print out any of the comments from my nieces and nephews, so those were lost which makes me really sad!
Tonight I finished typing out all of my "pre-Vince" blog posts (from October 2006 to August 2007) and added them to my archives. It was fun reliving some of those moments of my life, which seem like a lifetime ago now! I think it was a bit therapeutic for me as well, as I was reminded of all the healing that God brought to me during a very long and sometimes difficult season as a single parent. This post in particular from January 7, 2007 brought tears to my eyes. I wrote it before I ever knew who Vince Howard was...months before I ever laid eyes on the man who would later that year become my Mr. Wonderful. I wonder....no, I know that God had things all planned out for Vince and I when I wrote that post. I just didn't know it yet. I had to get to a place in my heart where I trusted God with my future, and was at peace with His plans for me. This was a step in that journey...a journey that I still travel.
Friday, November 06, 2009
Coughing, peeing myself, and other exciting adventures of my day
I am home from work today....coughing, drinking tea, breathing through my mouth, raiding the kids' halloween candy (sorry kids, the Milkyways are mine). I'm not on my deathbed, but my throat is killing me, I really don't have a voice, and I am coughing every 8.2 seconds. Which reminds me of childbirth. Not so much the birthing process itself, but the lack of bladder control and subsequent peeing on myself that apparantly happens when coughing alot after one has birthed children.
Or maybe it's just me.
Nevertheless, I thought it best not to cough and pee all over everyone, so I decided to stay home today.
I'm not going to go back to bed yet (a nap is on my agenda later) and I don't have the energy to do anything like laundry (thank goodness!) so I thought I'd venture into something far more productive...giving my blog a makeover.
I'm not sure why I'm doing this because change usually stresses me out, and I really like my blog design as is. But it might be fun and I'm bored so we'll see what happens.
At some point today, if you hear someone say "oh no" followed by a thud, that will be my husband's head hitting his desk at work when he reads this and finds out that I am going to try and change my blog by myself.
Or maybe it's just me.
Nevertheless, I thought it best not to cough and pee all over everyone, so I decided to stay home today.
I'm not going to go back to bed yet (a nap is on my agenda later) and I don't have the energy to do anything like laundry (thank goodness!) so I thought I'd venture into something far more productive...giving my blog a makeover.
I'm not sure why I'm doing this because change usually stresses me out, and I really like my blog design as is. But it might be fun and I'm bored so we'll see what happens.
At some point today, if you hear someone say "oh no" followed by a thud, that will be my husband's head hitting his desk at work when he reads this and finds out that I am going to try and change my blog by myself.
Wednesday, November 04, 2009
A legacy
A young woman died in our community last week. I didn't know her personally, but knew her and her family in the way that small town people all "know" eachother. She was 41, a wife, a mother of three - two of whom are in our kids' classes. She was a preschool teacher, a beloved friend, a woman of God. She was involved in her church - not just an attender, but she went to bible studies and womens' retreats. And she had a beautiful voice.
Last I heard was that they didn't know the reason for sure, and maybe never will. It may have been a heart attack, but they don't know. She didn't have any health problems that anyone was aware of. One thing they do know is that it was sudden and unexpected and heartbreaking.
As you can imagine, this has me thinking. A lot. The description of her life is so similar to mine, it's scary. I'm not so much scared for myself and wondering if this could or would happen to me. It's just scary that there are no guarantees. I used to think that faith in God was a type of guarantee that nothing really bad would happen in my life. Sure, bad things happen to everyone. Even believers. But a tragedy of this magnitude couldn't possibly slip through God's loving, protective hands.....could it?
Six years ago, I would have said no way. Three years ago Vince may have said no way as well. But life experience tells us differently now. And so does the bible. But for most of my life I just preferred to ignore those parts that talked about suffering. They wouldn't apply to me in my lifetime - not on that level anyway. And I have a confession to make...I also used to think that if something so tragic happened to someone, there was an underlying reason for it. They weren't a christian? Well, that's a no-brainer. But if they were? That's a little more difficult to understand and accept. But there still must have been a reason. Somehow they were not fully committed to God, their faith was not where it should be, and that is how this tragedy was able to slip into their lives.
I know that sounds judgemental of me, and to some extent it was. But thinking this way was not so much me standing there pointing fingers, rather it was me curling up under a blanket. Insulating myself from the possibility that it could happen to me. Other people's children die, not mine. People with less faith have spouses that leave them, either by choice or by death, but not me. If I do everything right in God's eyes, if I believe enough, pray enough, and love enough, then God will protect me from that type of suffering and loss.
I know different now. And this song says it more perfectly than I ever could. God doesn't promise us a life protected from suffering, He promises to be there. How could He be our Healer if there was nothing to heal? How could He be our Redeemer, if there was nothing to redeem? How could He be our Prince of Peace, if we never experienced chaos? And how could He be our Comforter if we did not endure suffering?
And how can we be there...truly be there for others if we have not been there ourselves?
Perhaps there is a purpose in all things. Perhaps not. But I have learned this...God brings purpose to all situations. He takes what the enemy means for evil, and draws good from it. Not just good...but life. I have found that through suffering I have grown in ways that I otherwise would not.
There. Now that I've written all that, I can wrap it up with Romans 8:28 and click "publish".
Except, that's not what I sat down to write about.
What really drew me here was fear. I'm scared. Not scared of dying, but scared of failing. Failing my kids, failing my family and friends, failing God with my life. You should hear all the things everyone is saying about this woman who died...what a wonderful mother she was, a devoted wife, a woman of God. She touched so many lives and made such an incredible impact.
And it makes me wonder...am I making the impact that I so desperately long to? Am I a blessing to my kids? Do I care enough about others? Am I the loving wife that I long to be? Do I truly have a spirit of love and grace that blesses others? Do you see Jesus in me?
What will people say about me when I am gone? Are they true about me now?
Legacy by Nichole Nordman
I don't mind if you've got something nice to say about me
And I enjoy an accolade like the rest
You could take my picture and hang it in a gallery
Of all who's who and so-n-so's that used to be the best
At such'n'such ... it wouldn't matter much
I won't lie, it feels alright to see your name in lights
We all need an 'Atta boy' or 'Atta girl'
But in the end I'd like to hang my hat on more besides
The temporary trappings of this world
I want to leave a legacy
How will they remember me?
Did I choose to love? Did I point to You enough
To make a mark on things?
I want to leave an offering
A child of mercy and grace who
blessed your name unapologetically
And leave that kind of legacy
I don't have to look too far or too long awhile
To make a lengthly list of all that I enjoy
It's an accumulating trinket and a treasure pile
Where moth and rust, thieves and such will soon enough destroy
Not well traveled, not well read, not well-to-do or well bred
Just want to hear instead, "Well Done" good and faithful one...
Last I heard was that they didn't know the reason for sure, and maybe never will. It may have been a heart attack, but they don't know. She didn't have any health problems that anyone was aware of. One thing they do know is that it was sudden and unexpected and heartbreaking.
As you can imagine, this has me thinking. A lot. The description of her life is so similar to mine, it's scary. I'm not so much scared for myself and wondering if this could or would happen to me. It's just scary that there are no guarantees. I used to think that faith in God was a type of guarantee that nothing really bad would happen in my life. Sure, bad things happen to everyone. Even believers. But a tragedy of this magnitude couldn't possibly slip through God's loving, protective hands.....could it?
Six years ago, I would have said no way. Three years ago Vince may have said no way as well. But life experience tells us differently now. And so does the bible. But for most of my life I just preferred to ignore those parts that talked about suffering. They wouldn't apply to me in my lifetime - not on that level anyway. And I have a confession to make...I also used to think that if something so tragic happened to someone, there was an underlying reason for it. They weren't a christian? Well, that's a no-brainer. But if they were? That's a little more difficult to understand and accept. But there still must have been a reason. Somehow they were not fully committed to God, their faith was not where it should be, and that is how this tragedy was able to slip into their lives.
I know that sounds judgemental of me, and to some extent it was. But thinking this way was not so much me standing there pointing fingers, rather it was me curling up under a blanket. Insulating myself from the possibility that it could happen to me. Other people's children die, not mine. People with less faith have spouses that leave them, either by choice or by death, but not me. If I do everything right in God's eyes, if I believe enough, pray enough, and love enough, then God will protect me from that type of suffering and loss.
I know different now. And this song says it more perfectly than I ever could. God doesn't promise us a life protected from suffering, He promises to be there. How could He be our Healer if there was nothing to heal? How could He be our Redeemer, if there was nothing to redeem? How could He be our Prince of Peace, if we never experienced chaos? And how could He be our Comforter if we did not endure suffering?
And how can we be there...truly be there for others if we have not been there ourselves?
Perhaps there is a purpose in all things. Perhaps not. But I have learned this...God brings purpose to all situations. He takes what the enemy means for evil, and draws good from it. Not just good...but life. I have found that through suffering I have grown in ways that I otherwise would not.
There. Now that I've written all that, I can wrap it up with Romans 8:28 and click "publish".
Except, that's not what I sat down to write about.
What really drew me here was fear. I'm scared. Not scared of dying, but scared of failing. Failing my kids, failing my family and friends, failing God with my life. You should hear all the things everyone is saying about this woman who died...what a wonderful mother she was, a devoted wife, a woman of God. She touched so many lives and made such an incredible impact.
And it makes me wonder...am I making the impact that I so desperately long to? Am I a blessing to my kids? Do I care enough about others? Am I the loving wife that I long to be? Do I truly have a spirit of love and grace that blesses others? Do you see Jesus in me?
What will people say about me when I am gone? Are they true about me now?
Legacy by Nichole Nordman
I don't mind if you've got something nice to say about me
And I enjoy an accolade like the rest
You could take my picture and hang it in a gallery
Of all who's who and so-n-so's that used to be the best
At such'n'such ... it wouldn't matter much
I won't lie, it feels alright to see your name in lights
We all need an 'Atta boy' or 'Atta girl'
But in the end I'd like to hang my hat on more besides
The temporary trappings of this world
I want to leave a legacy
How will they remember me?
Did I choose to love? Did I point to You enough
To make a mark on things?
I want to leave an offering
A child of mercy and grace who
blessed your name unapologetically
And leave that kind of legacy
I don't have to look too far or too long awhile
To make a lengthly list of all that I enjoy
It's an accumulating trinket and a treasure pile
Where moth and rust, thieves and such will soon enough destroy
Not well traveled, not well read, not well-to-do or well bred
Just want to hear instead, "Well Done" good and faithful one...
Sunday, November 01, 2009
Pumpkins and apples, frogs and hearts
We had such a great weekend. Vince's sister Donna and her family were here and we had a wonderful time with them! Even Dave. (It's ok, he knows I love him :)
It has taken me over two hours to decide what pictures to post, as I was snapping away hundreds of pictures all weekend. I'm seriously addicted! Soooo here's what I chose to represent the festivities.
It all started with pumpkin pizza...
The littlest pumpkin....our grandson Jaden
And then, the carmeling of the apples commensed...
Of course, sampling the carmel was a necessary step, right Donna?
And by the grace of God, no one was impaled by any of our kids carving pumpkins with sharp objects...
Didn't they turn out awesome? From left to right, Nick's was a white pumpkin - he did the face all himself! Next was Kyle's, then cousin Rose's, Vinny made an "L" in his (you'll see why in the next pic) and Hope made a paw print on one side and an "H" on the other.....see the reflection on the house?!
Then Mario & Luigi got ready to go out on the town!
Dorothy was ready for her trip to Oz
And the Viking was ready for some football, or to conquer new worlds, or whatever would be needed
Trevor was ready to fight Batman as the Joker, and Whitney was ready to be Trevor in his stead :)
And then there was a punkin head in a froggy costume...
...who has stolen our hearts.Tuesday, October 27, 2009
The kind of math I like
Sunshine + fall colors + happy kids + camera + weekend = non-traditional school pictures and a trip to the pumpkin patch!!!
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